Ah, the shitty poetry of cleaning your keyboard.
Roommates can bring out the best in us; but usually they just bring out the worst. Watch the last two episodes of Comedians Crashing Couches here.
I’VE BEEN GIF’D! THAT IS NEAT!
I got very sweaty learning how to box for Self Magazine's series Girl vs. Sweat. And hoo boy, they really know how to choose a thumbnail photo.
Please check out this delightful project I worked on with Nikki Glaser for Comedy Central and AT&T, Comedians Crashing Couches. I’d say we’re pretty amazing at sucking at football.
New form of exercise:
You know in Jackie Chan movies when he fights off like 17 guys at once? It’s doing that but with zero guys. I recommend it.
Last night I smashed a mosquito on my leg as it was in the middle of biting me and it was an explosion of blood. It was a gruesome sight. Especially if you’re another mosquito. Because there’s no way they want to see their brethren murdered, but blood is the thing they find most delicious. It’d be like if you saw your uncle get stabbed and explode into french fries. You’d be like, “NO!!! Yes! NO!!”
I’ve walked by this place a dozen times and it makes me medium crazy that their tagline isn’t “Heaven must be missing a bagel.”
The website Beauty High requested I make a tutorial about how to contour your face like Kim Kardashian’s. Luckily I know ALL THE SECRETS.